The Fate of the Furious

The Fate of the Furious                                                                                   April 18, 2017

All the Fast and Furious (F&F) hallmarks are present. Relentless action, steroid infused fights, fantastic car races, uber-pyrotechnics and a plot little more than a footnote. Some of the gags and CG are approaching cartoon status. In one scene, it was literally raining cars. There is so much testosterone in this movie Vin Diesel and Dwayne Johnson should have spontaneously sprouted hair like a Chiba Pet. This said, this film is probably the most fun movie of the franchise. Feeling financially secure the producers are taking themselves less seriously. Former rivals are becoming strange bed fellows.

Thank God Vin Diesel’s acting has not improved keeping the Dom Toretto mystic intact. Dwayne Johnson is the ex-foe now Toretto comrade. The two compete in the tightest tee shirt contest. Jason Statham retains his sand paper beard and has a duplicitous role of foe and friend. The transitions are entertaining. The rest of the crew Letty, Roman, Tej Parker are still good guys. Bucking baldness, Ludacris sports a full head of hair; he was funnier without it.

The arch villain is Charliz Theron (the most beautiful women in the world, in my opinion). Unsmiling with her bleached white dread locks, she almost looks unrecognizable. Her character was devoid of humor or humanity. What a waste of beauty and talent. Lindsey Lohan would have done it on the cheap baring talent.

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There are two new characters. One of them manages to humanize Jason Statham. Helen Mirrin appears briefly (I should have not mentioned her). A fun part of the movie is old friends and enemies make cameos contributing to the light heathenness of the movie.

Surprisingly, the opening scenes are in Cuba, specifically Old Havana where I was just a few weeks ago. I recognized the neighborhoods and the Capital Plaza de La Revolucion, the starting point of the mandatory drag race. What I did not see was a long-legged chick in a short floral micro mini skirt wearing red stilettos (size 6) waving a silk unmentionable to start the race. Senior moment or not that I would have remembered!

The fate in Fate of the Furious is the box office. The movie exceeded opening weekend estimates of +$100 m. Worldwide all time net box office (after production cost) for the franchise is about $3.4 billion. Incentive enough for more films.